Daily Post: Stroke of Midnight

I was in my room,

On my bed,

With my cat,

Sleeping on my lap,

Staring at my phone,

Except two, no one called!

Obviously I never wanted it to be like that but that’s how it was. Off late, i am kind of used to being alone. Living with just my parents in a new town, i don’t have anyone to talk to, except two of my friends who stay miles away from me, so basically we just talk on phone. But, i don’t feel lonely anymore. I can spend hours sitting idle, without telivision,texts,phone,internet,books, anything. I don’t get excited to celebrate such special days now, be it new year, my birthday, diwali or any other festival.

As we grow up, we lose interest in so many things which used to be so important to us at some point of time. Am i the only one feeling that or is it a general phenomenon? Well, i don’t know. Sometimes i feel i’ve really lost that innocent little girl, running down the lanes of her small hilly town, wearing those colorful frocks, enthusiastic for every small festival or day. The one who exists now is a girl who wants to relive her past, hates her present and is scared about her future.

Where were you last night when 2012 turned into 2013? Is that where you’d wanted to be?

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41 comments on “Daily Post: Stroke of Midnight

  1. Teresa Cleveland Wendel says:

    I wish I’d known that innocent little girl who ran down the lanes in a colorful frock.
    The way you wrote this post makes me sure that you and I were kindred spirits–and still are now that we’re grown.
    One day at a time, my friend. I’m looking forward to getting to know you.

    • pseudomonaz says:

      I wish i could tell you how happy that little girl used to be, that girl i lost somewhere.
      We surely are. You know i’ve met so many people here who are like me in so many ways. people i don’t find in the world i live in but here as i write or read about them. I feel blessed to find friends like you here. thank you.

  2. soumyav says:

    i was at home..wth family…and enjoying peacefully..

  3. Amit says:

    I was sleeping. In my home.
    And that is exactly what I wanted. Bliss. :)

  4. Tapish says:

    I was at home, eating ‘gajar ka halwa’ my mom cooked for me :P

    And, I think it’s general, it also happens with me. We change with time, our interests, likes and dislikes also transform.

  5. Its not about likes and dislikes.. Its about transferring our focus from one thing to another
    We still like certain things that we used to do when we’re younger but we don’t do that now, not because we don’t like but because we don’t want to. Its a part of life but we have to keep faith and try to keep ourselves happy.. And yes don’t miss to celebrate special days for that they never gonna come again.. and would like to see your cat’s pic, i too had one at my house.
    keep smiling :-)

  6. Mythreyi says:

    I was at home, and I knew I only had loneliness to look forward to, so I did the smart thing and went to sleep. I remember a time when I used to love festivals and look forward to them so much, but now I dread them because I still haven’t grown up enough to stop hoping for miracles and every time my hopes are dashed I just feel more miserable. I guess I’m still hoping and waiting for the day when I spend a happy new year instead of a crappy one. Next year, maybe?
    Happy New Year to you, my friend, and hope 2013 does good things for us all and brings back the happy times we remember from the past. . :)

    • pseudomonaz says:

      I wish i could sleep so early. And as you said i was waiting for a miracle only, like i would get some calls but i didn’t.
      If i could write like you, i would have written the same things. That’s how i feel. I still hope for miracles and everytime my hopes are dashed, but i don’t stop expecting. I am still waiting.
      Happy new year to you too. Hope we make many more memories, moments we’ll cherish all our life.

  7. [...] Daily Post: Stroke of Midnight | PSEUDOMONAZ [...]

  8. renxkyoko says:

    I was at a New years Day party.

    Happy 2013 and cheers !

  9. I was writing poetry, enjoying the birth of the new year! We will always be with you in this new year…much love to you always!

  10. Vishnu says:

    everyone wants to go back to innocent ages, but it’s not what life is . eyes forward , traversing time , standing tall , come what may !

    • pseudomonaz says:

      I know..its always about moving forward. But don’t we always wish to go back in our past, or is it only me. Well i’ll try to embrace my future with an open heart, come what may, as you said.

  11. Yahobahne says:

    Unfortunately the innocence fades and reliving our past, well that’s just impossible. We all have to grow up. That’s life.
    Great writing. Thanks for sharing your gift.

  12. It’s called ageing my dear…..Lol… ;) :P
    But what you wrote is quite true….the charisma and magic of such occasions just wears off with time gradually. Though i still want to feel as excited and happy about these events…..yet i am unable to.
    Same here girl…..you have written my heart out in the last lines..”….who wants to relive her past, hates her present and is scared about the future…”

    • pseudomonaz says:

      Then i’ve one more thing to worry about, i am an old lady already at 22. ;-)
      The same goes for me. I can’t enjoy all these things even if i want to.
      Don’t worry, you know i’ve hopes that its gonna be better, for you and for me. We just need to remember 4 words, “this too shall pass”. :-)

  13. SinPSarkar says:

    Ow Girl!
    Before all, Wish you a Very Happy Year 2013 and beyond the periphery of it!
    Kept occupied travelling a lot and finally composed at the place I am meant to be!

    How are you?
    And c’mon, Cheer up! You have a journey to get into! :)

    • pseudomonaz says:

      Hey, happy new year to you too. I guess you had a great time. I am good. That was just the challenge that got me into that mood. I am not such of a person who’ll be gloomy all the time, my mood changes in moments. Travelling haan?? Which places did you visit?

  14. wishingisfun says:

    I love cats! I think we don’t get excited anymore because we change, or because life is so hectic, or we find other interests – but I think we need to try and find that excitment again, just sometimes to keep those things alive!

    • pseudomonaz says:

      I love cats too… :-)
      Yes, we really need to find that excitement again, we need to live those unforgettable moments. The question is how? How can we be that happy kid again?

  15. Beem says:

    People change. In 10 years you will be a different person to who you are today, just as you are different now to when you were younger, 10 years ago.

  16. SimplySage says:

    Hello, I want to thank you for all the visits, likes, and the follow of my blog. I’m so glad to meet you. I hope SimplySage will increase joy in your life!

  17. nabadip says:

    Well,i spent it reading a Jeffrey Archer novel!
    Btw,that last paragraph-while those times will never come back,surely we can find still have excitement even when we grow up!happiness is never about age,is it?! So have fun in what you do!

    • pseudomonaz says:

      Happiness is never about age, I agree, its just that I miss my childhood. It is still the best phase of my life. The complexities increased with increasing age.

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