I had applied to many colleges after I got my GATE results. Apparently my rank wasn’t good enough, so I’ve got calls from only three colleges till now.And among those three I can only report to two as two colleges have tests/ interviews on the same date. Tomorrow I am leaving for Chennai, although the test is on 20th I’ve booked my tickets for 17th as weekend tickets are generally more costly. After getting rejected from some colleges I’ve realized one thing that, only gate results don’t matter, you must have a heavy resume to be shortlisted for interviews and in my case, my resume sucks, adding to that I’ve spent the last year doing absolutely nothing. Why is this world so competitive? Sach kaha hai, ye ek rat race hai, agar koi 2 minute bhi aaraam krne baith jaye to ye duniya use phir kabhi mauka nahi deti! No one wants to know your state of mind, your personal problems, you have to be the best, because is country mai jo average hai, wo hamesha average hi rhega. Use mauka nahi milta kabhi aage badhne ka, even if he’s willing to sacrifice everything for it. I don’t have any reasons to explain why I wasted this one year of my life, or why I wasn’t serious till the last year of college. I am officially screwed.
I am scared, mostly because I didn’t touch my books from the past four months. Why I did that? Well, I really don’t have any answers. I was way too frustrated, I was lazy, I was bored, I had given up, I wanted something easy…reasons like these come to my mind, not exactly, but something close to these. I don’t have any hopes to get through the written tests/ interviews these good institutions take. I don’t even feel like travelling this much to get rejected. I gave up when I was almost few meters away from my dream. I should have studied, but trust me, I didn’t really know how, I was so dejected, so frustrated with everything. I wrote GATE, I got a rank, that was it, I was saturated beyond imagination. I know I am making stupid excuses now and I am the reason for all my miseries but seriously I just can’t study anymore. If somehow, I get into a college, for free, without writing more exams, I am happy with it. I just don’t know how to fight anymore. Moreover, I really don’t know why I’ve to be the only one who has to fight so much, why can’t I get anything easily.
Well, enough of my rant now. Let’s see, what happens in Chennai. If not anything, I’ll at least get to visit a new city. I’ll keep you updated with everything that happens there. This is my life that we are talking about here, so don’t expect everything to be normal, kuch na kuch dhamaka to hoga hi. And the dhamaka has already started, this evening a spider bit me, not at one but two places on my arm, it’s paining and itching like hell. In spite of the pain, I was daydreaming about how I can now turn into a Spiderwoman now. I actually tried to shoot spider webs from my wrist, yes I did that two times, sadly there were no webs, I was disappointed. 😦
Hey bhagwan, agar tu mujhe spiderwoman nahi bana sakta to atleast ek college hi dila de, kya bigad jaega tera agar mujh garreb ko ek seat mil jaye do saal timepass karne ke liye, bol bhagwan bol… !!! 😦
Khair, pray for me, if not college than at least an interview, I don’t want to be thrown out of the place just after the written test. If the interview happens, it’ll be the first one for me. Yes, I want to be thrashed in my first interview. Mai ye jillat seh lungi yaar, bus mujhe interview tak jana hai, itni door jake kaun khega ki mai interview se pehle hi out ho gyi. 😦
Anyway, even if I do get rejected in the written test itself, I am gonna tell everyone that I got into the interview, yup, I’ll lie. Pehle se bta de rhi hun.
Chalo bye bye. Reading this post, I feel like I am the most stupid person on this earth. Kya karna, chalta hai kabhi kabhi!
P.S. Spider bites suck!!!