I realized I have no friends when yesterday I had literally no one to talk about the Virushka wedding. So, Virat Kohli used to be my celebrity crush back when I was young, he was young, we were all young. (Disclaimer: I am not that old) Though I crushed my crush way back, yet as soon as the wedding pictures came into social media I had this huge urge to discuss everything right from Anushka’s beautiful lehenga, the precious smiles on both their faces, the lovely wedding venue and the cute engagement video with another human. I let myself go yesterday in the world of leaked pictures and all the gossip behind them.
I used to be a shy and reserved girl in my under grad. I would never talk to guys and keep myself away from anything fun. Yes, I had girl friends and we used to talk a lot but it was different. I was an introvert. College ended, and so did my introversion. I was dying to go to a new place and find a new me. Luckily, I got into a good college for my post grad and met people who were so like me and I made it a point to never shy away from anything. I really enjoyed my two years of college. And I really credit my blog for that. It is here where I really learned to talk, to be myself, to actually realize what I like and what I would like to be with people. I didn’t like being a reserved person. I was like that because of where and how I was raised by my parents. I wasn’t me but was their shadow. If I didn’t like anything, it was because I was never allowed to do anything on my own. I had deep seated ideals I never wanted to break. And it is not like I don’t have any ideals now. I do. But, they are what I believe in. For instance, I am still an alcohol virgin; because I choose to be so, because that is one path I would never like to tread on.
So, blogging actually made me a chatter box. But for the last two years, I actually made no new friends. The only new people I met were my flat mates with whom I had nothing in common and then some friends of my guy (who is the biggest introvert I know). And my old friends, well some got married, some are pregnant, some have kids, some got married and forgot to invite me despite me being their agony aunt for several years. Basically, everyone had moved on from the days where we would talk about celebrity weddings.
This left no one but my guy. He has chosen to stay with me despite seeing me at all levels of craziness. So, I bugged him for hours, sent him screenshots of the wedding from social media, and ohhhed and aaahed at how beautiful everything was. Midway our conversation he reminded me that just yesterday at lunch I had listed twenty things about why marriages are stupid and a waste of money and how I used to like wedding pictures earlier but find them too pretentious now especially with people posing like movie stars and mimicking fairytales.
Well, I admit I said those things but I think I might want to tweak my theory a little bit. Marriage is stupid but not for Virat and Anushka. And when they pose for pictures, they aren’t actually posing; they are stars in real life. Their life is actually a fairytale. It is mortals like us, who suffer after spending hefty amounts on one wedding. According to a study, an average Indian spends about one fifth of the wealth accumulated in his lifetime over one wedding ceremony. So, I am not entirely wrong.
Anyway, I hope by writing it all here, I have managed to suppress my urge to gossip. I could go back to being normal now. The only other news that could break my gossip hibernation is if Salman Khan decides to get married and I don’t see that happening anytime in the near future.
(I had no intention to hurt people who are married/ or would like to get married. These are entirely my thoughts, conditioned by all the screwed up marriages I have seen around me. Don’t let my thoughts bother you.)