As 2014 sets in, I sit here in my room thinking of the year that has gone by. What an eventful year it has been for me! The first four months were spent in filling application forms, writing entrance exams, and waiting for results. And yes, it was a depressing phase of my life. I was unsure of my future; I was scared of failure, of sitting idle for one more year. Thankfully that didn’t happen as I managed to do well in one of those exams. The next three months I was travelling to different parts of the country attending interviews, counselling, writing some more exams. I went to Delhi almost every week. I went to Bangalore, Chennai, Dehradun, Roorkee, West Bengal. I spent less time at home than at airports, railway and bus stations. It was an exciting phase for me. For the first time in life I was travelling all alone, meeting friends, bloggers, and strangers on the way. I lost old friends but made new ones, and that was really great.
Pratiksha was the first blogger I met in person . Unlike my ‘real’ friends she took some time off from office to come and see me in Chennai while I was there for an exam. Even hot and humid Chennai was fun with her. We went to Marina beach, discussed the good and not so good things happening in our lives. We wrote our names on sand, tried to click pictures together which unfortunately didn’t come out right. The day ended with an awesome dinner. I love you Prat for being such a great friend, to never judge me for the choices I have made in life, and to be there for me.
The second meeting was with Tatsat, the most complicated person I’ve ever known, though he’ll start arguing with me for calling him complicated, but that doesn’t matter anymore I guess. So, I was this little girl who bothered him by writing long emails, for seeking his opinion on every issue in her life and then arguing with him over the suggestions he has given. We met in Delhi, two times this year, roamed in CP both the times, discussed about life, career and mostly about love. He is the only one among my friends who has actually met my boyfriend, and as my guy doesn’t know about my blog, I have to lie to him that Tatsat is my cousin..hehe. Crazy, is the word that describes us both. I respect you for the choices you have made in life, and for standing firm by those choices. I hope you find the things and people who never disappoint you. I honestly hope so. Btw you were the blogger who commented the most on my blog this year. Thank you for that.
Lastly, how can I ever forget the three days I spent with Yash, in Bangalore. Those frequent emails, the innocent chats, exchanging numbers within 3 days we met (online), those texts and the calls where I cried for reasons I didn’t know. Two hopeless romantics, broken hearts talking about their respective love lives, their loss, their regrets. ..While my friends called me insane for being infatuated with a random guy I met through my blog, I couldn’t stop myself from talking to you. You made me realize how I was living a lie, you made me cry to make me normal, you were the friend I never had. I never intended to hurt you, and if somehow I have, I am sorry for that. When I met you, I realized how you were as vulnerable as I was, that you’ve lost people you didn’t want to lose, how you have dreams of making it big in life and how you are working so hard for that. I really respect you for that and I hope you succeed in everything you do.
Coming back to my life in 2013, I joined college in August. This college was nothing like my previous one. That one had big buildings, huge infrastructure, mean people, few friends and more enemies… this one has people with big hearts instead of big buildings, people who respect you for your nature, intelligence, more than your looks or money. My professional life isn’t that great but I am more confident and happy. I am living each day as it comes. I still cry over petty issues but I laugh more.
The last post I wrote was before my exams. I was ill for a long time. December was a really bad month for me in terms of health this year. As I came home, I was diagnosed with typhoid. I had plans to visit my hometown, but couldn’t do so owing to my illness. I have been to hospitals all this month, sometimes for myself and then for my relatives. While people visit pilgrimages, tourist spots during their holidays I spent most of the time in hospitals. Yes, it depresses me sometimes but in some ways or other I am helping people, and that is what I want to do in life, so it’s not that bad. I really hoped not to visit a hospital tomorrow, as it was the first day of the year, but today my mom is tested positive for typhoid, and I am quite sure it’s because of me. So, I’ve another appointment with the doctor tomorrow. We really can’t expect life to be as we plan right, so that’s the reason I never make any New Year resolutions. Life for me, is never normal. And honestly, I am not complaining.
2013 was an year of changes, of learning to letting go, of finding happiness with little things, of taking care of my own people, of arguments and heartbreaks, but everything has its own significance.Often we tend to forget old things, when we find something new. I am one such person who loves living in her memories, remembering people who left, and thanking the ones who stayed. And if you have made it till here, I want to wish you a very very Happy New Year. I hope to write a lot more this year and I thank you for still being with me in this journey. 🙂
The Last Sunset